i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
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