your thong is hanging out like whoa
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
