why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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