VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize