hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
