there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
