It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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