so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Someone shattered a urinal.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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