Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
not ubering you a puppy
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize