have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
