Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
