Fine. I'll sleep in my office
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
