I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
you will always have a special place in my vag
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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