i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
