so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Randomize