At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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