and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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