Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Randomize
