Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
