OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize