i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
As shirtless as possible
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
