Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
We just shotgunned beers for America
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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