Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I have aggressive nipples.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize