I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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