I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
