He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
How does one acquire holy water?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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