normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Randomize
