Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
