i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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