My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize