Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I'm always down for nudity.
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