go do what you do best...puke behind churches
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
