If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Randomize
