Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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