Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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