I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
