Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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