Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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