Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
you inspire me to be a worse person
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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