Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Randomize
