she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Randomize
