fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
