Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
