i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
