pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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