There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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