i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
