I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
