can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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