she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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