He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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